what do you mean, "not my problem"!?

so, okay - this morning, mea maxima culpa (latin for "my big bad"). never mind all the lectures, i *know* it wasn't the greatest option but it was the only one i had.

factor #1: i have a 3yr old. she's *very* strong, weighs 50lbs - if she doesn't want to do something, trust me: there's no way of forcing her without actually hurting her because of the force required to overcome the amount of inertia she can create which can probably generate its own gravitational pull. add to that a temper that registers on the fujita scale and you can see why dealing with her when she's stressed, frightened, or just woken up is SO not my idea of a party.

factor #2: i have a border collie mix, weighs 70lbs, and is hyper, hyper, HYPER. he *has* to be walked twice a day or he is out of control and demo's the house when left alone.

factor #3: mondays, tuesdays, and thursdays, i have a very tight morning schedule. we have to be out in the driveway at 9am or we miss our ride into town. hitch-hiking is pretty crappy in the mornings because the bugs are *fierce*. wearing mosquito gear is fine but even though it's mesh, you still end up hot and sticky because now you can't scratch and wipe it away.

last night, she got up around midnight - bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready to par-TAY. didn't get back to sleep until about 2am.

the usual schedule is:

0600 - wake up, get dressed
0630 to 0700 - walk the dog
0700 to 0830 - breakfast while going over Dog Whisperer and other PVR'd shows while she watches Caillou, Max and Ruby, etc.
0830 - 0900 - we watch Dora the Explorer together while i do her hair
0900 - outside waiting for our ride.

today, she didn't get up at 6. when i poked her softly to test for doneness, she shrieked "NOOO!!!!!" and whacked me across the side of the head before pulling the pillow over her head. i waited but when she started snoring, i figured i'd give her a little more time.

i spent the next little while going over the TV shows, brushing the dog, straightening the livingroom, drinking too much tea. i checked her again at 7, but she was dead to the world. by now, i was getting a bit nervous and the dog was definitely anxious - i let him out in the backyard to pee but when i called him right back in, he almost balked.

8am, she was still comatose. by now, the dog was literally going out of his mind. he would run from me to the door whining and pawing at it in between sessions of rolling on the floor at my feet.

when he rolled onto his back in front of me and peed all over himself, i realized we were out of time - i locked the front door, locked the gate separating the livingroom and bedroom from the rest of the house, loaded the dog's backpack up with six pounds, and headed up the road to the top of the hill and back - total walk time is only ten minutes but with his loaded backpack on, it drains him out pretty good. add a minute for him to do his number two (couple of them, actually) and that's it.

except on the way back, a pickup stopped and asked if i lived at the house across the bridge. i said yes and he said "your baby's in the road, you know".

WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!??????????????????

i *ran* back to the house and sure enough, there's saari, naked except for panties and crocs on the wrong feet, smiling and beaming at two girls who were giving me the stink-eye.

then all three of them start lecturing me! i tried to explain but they wouldn't even let me talk, just kept yammering.

finally i said "tell you what: since you're so concerned, why don't you come here every morning and watch her so i can give the dog a proper workout?"

"oh, well, that's not our problem," he said while the two girls sneered.

i said "if it's not your problem, why are you standing here getting all holier than thou on me? give me a solution."

then i asked him if he was a single father and he said no. i said how nice that he has a wife at home to do all the hard work for him. then i said until you know what it's like trying to split yourself into three pieces trying to look after everything all by yourself, don't you dare judge me.

he said if it happened again, he'd report me, i said that's certainly your right and took saari and the dog into the house.

today, i buy a lock for the bedroom door because i can't figure out for the life of me how she got out. the gate was still locked, the front door was still locked (it's a latch up at the top of the door, not the lock on the handle) so unless she managed to dematerialise through the actual wall of the house, i have no idea. the last thing i need is to have her pull the same stunt while i'm in the tub or doing laundry or something!